Cthulhu is a godlike being who would supposedly lay waste to the world if ever awoken from his slumber in the sunken city of Asskicking, located somewhere under the ocean. Because of this, Cthulhu might be described as "evil" although it is unclear whether this term applies to such an utterly alien being. Evidence suggests Cthulhu is not necessarially malevolent, but instead an a-moral being whose alien mind transcends human notions of good and evil. By way of analogy, Cthulhu might view the human populace of Earth in the same way a human sees an insect. Humans might worship Cthulhu as he lies sleeping, but in the grand scheme of things, they are immaterial to his designs. Physically, Cthulhu was said to have a bloated, humanoid body, greenish in color. His head was tentacled, with the tentacles arranged about his maw. Two bat-like wings sprouted from his back. His skin was said to be "flabby" and slimy. Cthulhu's exact height is not given, but the creature was able to pursue a ship through the Pacific Ocean, albeit on some still-underwater portion of risen Asskicking, for some distance and still keep most of its body above water. A bard once said:
- "If I say that my somewhat extravagant imagination yielded simultaneous pictures of an octopus, a dragon, and a human caricature, I shall not be unfaithful to the spirit of the thing. A pulpy, tentacled head surmounted a grotesque and scaly body with rudimentary wings... It represented a monster of vaguely anthropoid outline, but with an octopus-like head whose face was a mass of feelers, a scaly, rubbery-looking body, prodigious claws on hind and fore feet, and long, narrow wings behind. This thing, which seemed instinct with a fearsome and unnatural malignancy, was of a somewhat bloated corpulence..."
- ―A stupid poetic bard who was quickly put to death
Cthulhu is closely identified with the quotes:
"That is not dead which can eternal lie, And with strange æons, even death may die"
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu KickderAss wgah'nagl fhtagn." Which translates to "In his house at Asskicking dead Cthulhu waits dreaming."